growth – Polish The Soul

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Channeled message from my grandma

Posted on November 17, 2020November 17, 2020 by PolishTheSoul

Discovering what I was capable of and trusting it was a huge task for me. I in a sense feared who I am because I couldn’t understand it. I felt honored to have been given this gift but at the same time I couldn’t shake the fear of it all. When I decided to move forward and honor my truth, I was convinced I could help others find solace as a conduit for the other side. I had not thought about the healing I would experience for myself, just by standing up and leading despite my reservations. I found healing when I was not looking for it, I developed a relationship with my grandmother whom I had not known much when she was alive.

I lost my paternal grandmother four years ago. Ironically, on the 1st of November. 111 is a highly spiritual number and is linked to our spiritual awakening journey. Reminding us to pay attention to signs that the Universe is supporting our journey. Our job is to tune in and try to decipher the signs. 111 tells us not to be afraid to follow our intuition and trust the guidance we receive.

Growing up I had not felt much of a connection to her. I lived in the states, and she lived in the Dominican Republic. There were barriers all around our relationship. As a kid I didn’t care much for learning how to speak Spanish to be able to communicate with relatives. In my lifetime I could count on my fingers the amount of times I got to see her. She didn’t talk much, and we didn’t speak much over the phone. As I got old enough to understand the differences, I felt between my paternal and maternal grandmother; I realized we didn’t have much of a connection in comparison to the connection I had with my maternal grandma. We laughed, we joked and I knew how to identify her forms of affection. I never had that pleasure with my paternal grandmother.

When she passed I was a little confused as what to feel. I was sad, I cried at her funeral and can still hear the sounds of the hammers hammering into her casket to protect her casket from being stolen. In many cemeteries in the Dominican Republic, thieves come in and steal the caskets and remove the corpses to resell the caskets. It’s devastating to even imagine.The knocking sounds that was impeded into my memory is quite disturbing. As the months after her death began to pass, I began to notice my connection to the other side heightening again as it did years ago. At the time I didn’t correlate the connection to my grandmother at all. I was certain it was another spirit; I created a relationship with as I was deeply affected by her death as it home for me personally. I began to see white butterflies everywhere; my heart just couldn’t allow me to fathom the idea that it could have been my grandma. I figured she wouldn’t be the one making contact because we just did not have a “deep connection.” It wasn’t until about a year ago that I finally crawled out of the rock I was living under. I had an aha moment in which made me re-evaluate some of the signs I was seeing over and over again. I had begun seeing “111” and “624” more often than ever. I sat back and realized she had passed on 11/1, and I had grown up believing her birthday was 6/24. The signs were all there, I was just too blind to see them. Perhaps the pain I felt, placed a blindfold over my eyes. She passed away, and our stale connection was sealed forever, or so I thought. I believed she did not love me, because I did not feel her efforts to communicate with me which saddened me deeply. Creating some sort of void in my heart.

As I began exploring my ability to connect with spirit, I found myself in a meditative state in which I encountered my grandmas spirit. She appeared to me as splash of yellow. As her yellow silhouette approached my minds eye, my intuition automatically made me think of her. At the time I still had trouble trusting my intuition. So, I asked for her to validate my feeling. I asked for her to hold my hand.A few minutes later, I felt tingling kind of sensation on my left hand. It did not take me a long time to realize that was the sign I had asked for. I felt so full of emotion. I began to cry in the middle of my mediation; I just couldn’t control my emotions. I don’t know how else to explain what it felt like. I just know I felt so overwhelmed with love. That was one of many encounters I shared with her which happens to be one of my favorites.

Two months ago I learned how to channel specific spirits and receive messages from them. I had done readings for those closest to me, just to practice. I had an intuitive nudge to channel my grandma. I had no idea what to expect.I just knew something told me that I should. So I did just that. Although, I had begun to communicate with her more often and opened myself up to receive those signs from her I still had an energetic blockage separating us. Of course I did not know that, but she knew that. She took that time to give me a profound message which I wasn’t expecting.

I opened up the mediation with the intention to receive what I needed to know for my highest good. Two months ago today, she gave me this message:

“Healing hurts and sometimes love does to unless you know how to love.Its like driving a car. You have to know how it operates. You have to know how love works. It works differently for everyone; my “car” was different. I had my own way of driving. I loved in my own way. I love you, and I am sorry for making you feel any less than that. My granddaughter, my son’s daughter… I hold you with me. Open your heart to forgive me, so you can feel me. Being on this side everything is different, I understand more.”

I felt a sense of relief after receiving this message. It was so profound. She was absolutely right. We hold those around us responsible for the way in which they “love us” without understanding that we all love differently. I spent so much time comparing my relationship with my maternal grandma to the relationship I had with my paternal grandma. I created a foundation of what a relationship between a granddaughter and grandmother should look like based on my experience with my maternal grandma. I created an illusion which separated me from love. My ego convinced me that the love wasn’t there because the connection was different. Now that I have learned to differentiate the differences between ego, illusions and love, I understand my faults as well. My body was powered by ego and not by love.Ego is messy. I don’t want to be powered by ego any longer. I want to be powered by love. I want to see the light in others, despite our differences and their inabilities to live up to my “expectations.”

I hope this blog post has helped you open your eyes just a bit more to love. I hope you take this as a sign to fix the relationships you have with the living and there is ample time to reconnect and heal with those who are no longer living. My grandma Amalia helped me see life differently, all the way from the other side and I cannot thank her enough for doing so. I can feel her with me as I open up my heart to you all. I know she must be incredibly proud right now and jumping for joy. I finally tied the lesson together she has been trying to teach me for about four years, all by speaking my truth and sharing this with you all.

Love is real. Love heals all.

Polish The Soul 🤍✨

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Posts from @Polishthesoul Instagram

Posted on April 1, 2020 by PolishTheSoul

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Adjusting your identity

Posted on March 10, 2020March 10, 2020 by PolishTheSoul

I’ve been a student for about 19 years, pretty much my whole life. Now that I’ve finished my undergrad degree, I feel as though I am going through withdrawal symptoms. It’s been about a 1 1/2 year since graduation. I often feel lost without the idea of being a student. I could always find comfort in being a student because that was all I knew. I started college the summer after High School. I did not have a chance to digest what it would be like without the obligation of having to attend school. I was Sasha, the student for a very long time. Now that I have lost that part of my identity it feels strange and unfamiliar. I took a year off from school to focus and center myself before pursuing graduate school. I had a hard time deciding what my next steps would be but luckily I came to my senses.I enjoy all the free time of not having to worry about assignments and studying but I miss school so much.

I recently took a leap of faith and put my creative work to the test. I applied to several Fine Arts graduate programs. I cannot stop thinking about going back! The idea of going back to school gives me a feeling of being home. Eventually, I will have to learn how to live without the identity of being a student and adapt to another but in the meantime, I am set on going back to school and finishing up with my goal of becoming a graduate student. A part of me wonders if I am just going back to feel that sense of comfort again or if I am really going because I want to learn more. My relationship with school is very similar to that of Stockholm syndrome. The concept of school has a tendency of holding me hostage and stressing me out but I love it so much I cannot be without it, no how matter how hard it beats me down.

In this last year, I have gotten cozy with anxiety and stress. We’ve cuddled nonstop all day and night. I’ve felt defeated, angry, frustrated and even hopeless. In the midst of these emotions, I forgot to let go of the steering wheel and allow the universe to guide me freely. I was so fixed on the outcome of the situation that I forgot to be mindful of the journey. I was deaf and blind to the lessons in between the setbacks. Don’t get me wrong… I still wig out and want to pull out all my hair from the frustration but I’m slowly learning how to surrender to situations that aren’t in my control.

As a young student, I had always believed I would be a college graduate and I had always imagined continuing on to receive a graduate degree. I had always dreamt of the day that I could walk across the stage and where a fancy graduate gown. Just to think back to then, I am so proud of how far I have come. Although college degrees shouldn’t define you and still come with headaches and struggles, I am still humbled by my path. I would have never expected the struggles I would face after graduating, I thought finding my place in life would be easier. I always knew getting a “good job” straight after college would be a challenging road but I didn’t think it would take such a toll on my sanity. I currently work for the Department of Education, I was hired 6 months after graduation. Most people would say that I have a pretty good job but in my heart, I don’t feel content. I know my heart is searching for where I belong and I don’t belong here. I am grateful for the experience I have been exposed to thus far but I have a sense that my time here will be ending soon. As this chapter closes a new one will begin with many more lessons. I am ready to continue my journey elsewhere with a heart full of gratitude.

Polish The Soul xx

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Crystal Love Affair

Posted on March 2, 2020April 10, 2020 by PolishTheSoul

There’s no secret that I am a very spiritual woman by nature. I’ve had crystals in the past that I hadn’t done much with in the past as I had not understood the power stored within them. The first set of crystals I had purchased was on an Esty shop online. Looking back I’d say I wasn’t ready to commit to the lifestyle. Until, about last summer when I randomly found myself going in the wrong direction and I discovered a spiritual shop. I knew in my heart I had gotten lost on purpose in a sense. I walked into the shop and instantly felt at ease with the cleansing aroma in the air. I roamed around the store and looked at the different crystals they had and spiritual objects. I felt compelled to purchase a Rose Quartz bracelet. I had fallen completely in love with the bracelet, I instantly cleansed it and put it on my wrist right after receiving my receipt. What I hadn’t known at the time was that crystals choose you. While purchasing my Rose Quartz bracelet I had been memorized by this white and gray marble bracelet. I didn’t pay it much mind and I continued to pay attention to the Rose quartz because I felt I would benefit from Crystal in terms of compassion and self-love.

Several weeks later I returned to the store and roamed around again as if I had never seen the store. In complete amazement with the vibe and energy all around me. I bent down to check out some candles with crystals attached that stuck out to me on a self and sure enough the white and grey marble crystal had found its way in my path again. I scanned the shelf to read the labels on the other candles then again my eyes met the crystal. It was labeled as a calming candle. I gave in and picked up the candle that had the crystal attached to it. I read the benefits of the candle and kept it in my hand. I had no intention of putting it down. I knew that candle had been left over for me, it was the very last one of its kind on the shelf. I took that as a sign from the universe.

I had soon learned the name of the crystal ‘White Howlite’ thanks to the woman by the register helping me check out. I had walked out of the store with my candle as happy can be. Later that afternoon, I finally made it home and was eager to test out the candle. So… I prepared myself to meditate with the candlelit and the crystal in hand. I felt calm as can be as soon as I lit the candle. It was then and there that I discovered my life had just changed. I fell in love with the crystal and haven’t left it home since. It puts my mind in such a state of peace. My body felt light and airy. I returned to the store about a month later to purchase the ‘White Howlite’ bracelet I had been memorized with during my first visit.

I often, allow myself to be consumed with anxiety. I used to get flustered very easily and since wearing White Howlite I have noticed such a difference in my behavior. The White Howlite crystal broke the mold for me about understanding how crystals could change my life. I often, visit the store sometimes just to roam around and soak up the energy. Usually, I walk out with a shopping bag because I really can’t help it. Since then I’ve purchased 4 different bracelets, about 10 different crystals from the shop alone and I also have a large cluster of Amethyst for my bedroom and a Buddha. I turned my room into a recharging center for my energy. I’ve increased my pocket collection from one to about 5. The bulge in my pocket often looks a little odd in the silhouette of my pants but it is a must. I even brought back out my old crystals that I had brought years ago that I never found a use for before.

Last week, I mediated with a handful of my crystals and I had gotten so deep into my trance I could feel the palm of my hand pulsating. I was so fascinated and had never experienced a moment like that before. It was then that I realized how POWERFUL crystals are. I had so much energy in my left hand that I could feel my left-hand pulsate. I welcomed the energy in with open arms.

Tips for introducing crystals into your lifestyle:

Be open to receiving.
Open your heart and mind.
Cleanse them before introducing them to your energy.
Cleanse them every so often.
Set intentions: Tell the crystal what you what to receive.
Listen to your intuition.
Meditate with them.
Pray with them.
Speak to them.
Be ready to commit to the practice!
Carry them everywhere you go.
Crystals should be carried on the left side of the body.
You can carry them in your left pocket.
Ladies: stick them in your bra on the left side. Closer to your heart the better.
Too many crystals all at once can negatively affect you.
Research! Never stop learning about them.
Not all crystals work well together. Be cautious.